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If you have ever watched the Cinderella stories then we are more than glad to announce that it was just that “a story,” and there was nothing real about it apart from falling in love.
Many people might not agree but it is true that the fairy stories did brainwash us to thinking that there is a perfect man and woman and a perfect life.
As we grow up into adults and enter into the dating world, we tend to expect everything to be perfect, no arguments, no money issues and such.
So when the opposite happens we feel destroyed, we are filled with so much anger, and some people can barely handle the disappointment and grief thus end up taking their own lives.
In the past parents could hide their resentment towards each other, even the fights could rarely be heard, but one day after school you would be summoned to a separation meeting and your whole life is shattered. So what is the primary cause of women hating on their husbands?
When two people of the right age with the right life experience decide to stay together, they know what’s in store and are already braced to handle the obstacles, and that is why you see people going for couple counseling sessions.
And in case you didn’t know it is actually healthy to fight with your spouse because you are not Siamese twins that love and do everything in the same manner.
There are things that your husband will do that you will despise and there are things that a woman will do that the husband won’t like, but since you decided to be together you have to overlook the flaws and balance them with the good sides.
To this end, we have established that it is okay to hate at times, hate on your husband but don’t let it get out of hand.
According to Oprah Magazine, it is totally okay to hate your husband and as much as people will use the word hate on their better half doesn’t necessarily mean that they actually mean it.
However, for a relationship to stand its stable ground, couples have to undergo periods of disgust and annoyance towards their partners, as it gives them the chance to know the other dark crevices that make up the person.
How to stop hating your husband
Identify the root cause of the emotion
You don’t just wake up one morning and decide today I don’t like this individual, there has to be something that triggered you to feel that way.
So whenever you feel that you hate your partner there is usually some underlying root cause like maybe rejection or disappointment, only that you haven’t identified it. So if you can find out what caused the feelings of hate it becomes easier to fix.
Plan date nights
As we all know women love attention and if you can get it 100% from time to time then the feelings of hatred will consequently subside.
You and your partner need to plan on having some alone time together and do the things that you both love and enjoy.
Taking time out of your busy schedule to reconnect and finish it off with some good makeup sex will help release the feel-good hormones and it will also break the tension that was slowly building up.
Evaluate yourself
Whenever you feel like the feelings of hate have started heating up inside you, take a step back and find out which of your needs are not being met.
Sometimes you might be running too many things and projects at work that you barely get time to take care of yourself.
Remember you cannot offer love when you don’t have it, therefore, pamper yourself first so that you can be more loving to your spouse.
Don’t dwell on negativity
Whenever the feelings of anger start building up inside a person it becomes very hard to override them with positive thoughts.
However, we have a solution for you, so anytime negative thoughts creep up inside your head about your husband, override them with positive ones, and here we are talking about the good things that he has previously done for you.
Begin to obsess on the things that he has done right, write them down and weigh them against the negatives and you will find that the good outweighs the bad, so why are you hating?
Communication
Don’t let pride get in between the two of you, if you feel like you have been wronged seat your partner down and explain things to him, getting angry and engaging in cold war is not a solution.
Discuss the problem, let him see things from your perspective and find ways of dealing with the problem in case it pops up again in the future.
You might also realize that you could have played a role in the matter, so before you start pointing fingers check yourself.
Women have this tendency to communicate displeasure via actions to their partners thus driving the man away and then start harboring feelings of resentment.
Delegate
Anytime that you are with your husband and you both came from work tired, stop acting like superman and ask for help. Women can do everything by themselves pretty fast but when helped by the man they get some form of fulfillment.
The feelings of hate at this point will rarely surface, another thing though, don’t re-do what your husband has already done, because it will break their morale and they might refuse to help you the next day.
Forgiveness
Cheating in a relationship is one of the biggest sins that makes a woman hate her husband, and though it is almost impossible to come out of that painful situation, if you really love your man and want the relationship to work out, you have to learn how to forgive from deep inside your heart.
Of course, forgiveness doesn’t come easy and at this point, he will probably have to earn it, so if he is willing to change and ignite the love he once had for you then you have no reason to keep hating.
At times it would also be best to understand what led him to cheat so that you can work on the root of the problem to prevent it from shooting up again.
Explore your bedroom skills
Don’t play the dead cockroach all the time it gets boring given that men have been built for fun and adventure, therefore, come up with new sex styles or let him in on some mind-blowing oral sex.
Even better is building some serious sexual tension before you get to it so that you can both explore and enjoy. This is arguably one of the easiest methods to use to stop hating your husband because you tend to build the connection that was slowly fading.
Counseling
There are certain feelings of hate that quickly metamorphose into anger, hopelessness, and helplessness.
If by any chance you have reached this stage or you feel like you are trapped into living with someone that you don’t like then you will have to go through this issues with a certified therapist or counselor, this will help you to determine if you still want to stay and work things out or get divorced.